Advertisement

Cheating website offers $1 million to anyone who sleeps with Tim Tebow

The pro-infidelity matchmaking website, AshleyMadison.com, is offering $1 million to anyone who can prove they know Tim Tebow. And by "know," they mean "know." Carnally. Biblically. Hay-rollingly. Wink, wink; nudge, nudge; old-time car horn blaring.

"I guarantee that no man of Tim Tebow's stature could survive a season in New York without succumbing to the temptations of the city," CEO Neal Biderman sneers in a press release. His tone and repeated use of the word "sex" are two indications that he's not talking about splurging for good seats for "Phantom of the Opera" or overeating at Gray's Papaya.

"If Mr. Tebow is indeed abstaining from adult relationships," Biderman continues, "I would encourage him to find a nice lady or two and enjoy his youth and fame as much as possible."

Ugh. It's just tacky when people use Tebow for personal or financial gain. Leave him alone, you know?

RELATED SHUTDOWN CORNER LINKS

Tim Tebow is one of Time's 100 Most Influential People, had entry written by Jeremy Lin

16 weeks of Tebow: A look into the future

Tim Tebow got booed at Yankee Stadium

Should the Jets go for two every time with Tebow?

Tim Tebow is slightly less marketable than Oprah, but is a slightly better quarterback

Jets reportedly want Tim Tebow to live in Jersey to avoid the evils of NYC

Exclusive: Joe Namath rips Jets for Tim Tebow trade

Redskins official Twitter feed doesn't like Tim Tebow trade

Tim Tebow's friend says that he wants to head back to Florida

On what kind of team does Tim Tebow fit?

With Peyton Manning in Denver, what happens to Tim Tebow?

"The Bachelor" wants Tim Tebow

Tim Tebow and Jeremy Lin are phone buddies

Brady Quinn apologizes for Tim Tebow remarks

Tim Tebow asked to military ball by Louisiana airman

Tim Tebow is wearing jeans in his new print ad for Jockey

Jimmy Fallon merges Tim Tebow and David Bowie

Tim Tebow says no to "NFL Today" appearance

Salem witches plan to give Tom Brady a spiritual lift in Tim Tebow rematch

Tim Tebow is America's most popular athlete

Thanks, Off The Bench