'I couldn't sleep all night': Pascal Siakam on loss to Bulls

Toronto Raptors forward Pascal Siakam discusses the play-in loss, his future with the Raptors, why he didn't reach his goals for the season and what he's proud of.

Video Transcript

- Pascal, I know you were asked about this last night, but much is being made about that DeMar DeRozan's daughter last night. Could you hear that, when you guys were shooting?

PASCAL SIAKAM: I think so, yeah. I mean, yeah.

- Did it provide a distraction at all?

PASCAL SIAKAM: I don't know. I couldn't tell. I mean, we played enough games where there's opposite fans or whatever, like people do stuff at the free throw line. So I can't really tell you. I don't think so.

- That's it?

[INTERPOSING VOICES]

PASCAL SIAKAM: That was easy, I was like-- thanks.

- Where do you think things went wrong?

PASCAL SIAKAM: Yeah, that's a good question. But I just don't think I've put enough thoughts into all that. Like I didn't sleep at all last night, but like, I don't-- I can't tell you what I was thinking. Like, was--

- Oh, you didn't?

PASCAL SIAKAM: I didn't. I didn't sleep at all, but I just also wasn't really thinking of anything. I don't know if it makes sense. But I think it was just a lot. Like, we weren't consistent enough, as a team, to have the success that we want to have. A lot of ups and downs.

Win three games here and lose three games there. Like, it just wasn't enough consistency, like, to be able to win in this league and with a much improved, like, league, I would say. And especially with the East, like, a lot of good teams. And we needed to be more consistent, I think.

- Did you meet your own expectations for yourself?

PASCAL SIAKAM: No, I never. I think because the expectations that I have for myself is, like, it's always, always, always greater. I feel like I shoot-- I shoot for, like, what most people would deem impossible. You know, like, that's kind of, like, my mindset going into everything that I do. So obviously, it's, what, April--

- 13.

PASCAL SIAKAM: 13, yeah. Like, that's not-- definitely that wasn't in my plans to be here and talking about it. So definitely don't feel really, really accomplished, I would say, just because I think the team success is more important than anything. And when I work and how hard I work, it's to be able to win. Like, that's the most important thing.

And yeah, like, I just-- I think that there's always things to get better at. I was pretty much, I would say, like, consistent, but I felt like I could have done a lot more. I could have got-- there's times where it was also those up and downs that, like, you don't really want to see. But I felt like, no matter what, like, what I'm proud of, for me, like, this year, it's just putting the work in no matter what. Like, I was in there every single day, like, no matter good or bad.

And something that, in the past, I wasn't really able to do just because of I feel like my emotions. You know, like, sometimes I'll ride my emotions a lot more. And I felt like, this year, one thing that I got better at is just, no matter what, like, just putting the work in. Like, extreme hours just getting better every single day. And yeah, that's one thing that I would say that I'm proud of myself for doing.

- What was it like having Rico here for the full season, whether it be physically or emotionally, having him here working with you?

PASCAL SIAKAM: I don't know, it was awesome. It was awesome. Because like, Rico is like that favorite uncle you have. Like-- and like, sometimes he would say things and it's just like he's the only one that can get away with it. Like, and I just-- I just love being him being around.

And obviously, our relationship and him being a huge part of who I am, as a player. So it was great. It's great having him. And I think he helped a lot with everyone, the young guys, his energy, being there every day. And he's definitely one person that I take that-- or at least, it helps me have that attitude.

Because even if I didn't score any points, like, the next day, we're in here, like, we're in the gym. He has the energy. And we back to work, like, and that's always something that he has. Just no matter what, let's go to work. Like, that's our safe place.

Like, that's where everything just feels normal because, like, this is where, like, you work on your game. You just, every day, we're in there. And yeah, I just want to shout out all the other guys on the staff, obviously. But just for me coming in, Fab, John, Mike, [? Rachel, ?] like, all these people, every day, like, no matter what. I can be moody a lot sometimes. And they kind of deal with me and they bring that energy every day.

And I thought we had a good system. It's just, like, for me coming in. So I appreciate those guys. And you know, like I said, sometimes I could be a lot moody just because the season and things, ups and downs. And those guys keep me kind of like grounded.

And I appreciate it, for sure.

- You mentioned that you didn't get to reach your original goals this year, to get to that level that you're shooting for-- I know you've mentioned top five, in the past. Is there a specific area? Like, is it just about team success to kind of get you to that level? Is there something specific, in your game, that you feel like you need to--

PASCAL SIAKAM: Yeah, I think my game can always evolve. Like, I just-- I never feel like it is enough. Obviously, I can take a lot more 3's. Ball handling, make better reads. Just with me, handling the basketball a lot more sometimes.

And just, again, like, just continue to get better and see how I can manipulate the defense a little bit more, a little better, playing the double teams. And yeah, like, I just-- I just always feel like there's no way to be, like, no, I have to continue to shoot for what's out there. And I feel like there's opportunity to reach new levels. There's opportunity to continue to grow and get better.

So I'm never going to stop, like, just wanting to do that and wanting to continue to scratch and see how much I can squeeze out of my talent. That's a Rico line. But yeah, just seeing how much I can-- how far I can get. And I do believe that there's a lot more to accomplish for myself. And I love that challenge. I love the challenge of knowing that.

Because I think, even last game, it was just like, everything was going so well, like, and then, like-- and then it didn't. And I think that that's just always, for me, a constant reminder of, like, there's no satisfaction in anything that you accomplished. You know, like, you have to continue to strive to be the best that you can be. And for me, it's just kind of like the story of my life. Like, just continue to get better, no matter what.

There's going to be things thrown at you. Things might not go your way all the time, but you just have to continue to fight and continue to get better. And again, I know that I can handle it. So I'll take it. But it always motivates me to be a better version of myself.

- And how much of an adjustment has happened over the years, right? Because if you're always-- how do you-- how do you find satisfaction, never being satisfied? If you're just always pushing for this thing, right? Like, how do you kind of find that level of being able to live with constantly being-- trying to push that next level?

PASCAL SIAKAM: Yeah, no, because this is a way of life. Like, that's just me, like, in general, with everything that I do in life. Like, I always want to see what's out there. Like, I always want to get better. And I find myself, like, accomplishing more things when I do that.

Like, not being satisfied and just wanting to be the best I can be, all the time. And that's a way of life. Like, I don't see it as like, oh, you know, like, how hard is it to do that? Like, I just feel like it's just the way it is. Like, because at the end of the day, that's life, you know?

- Pascal, you mentioned, in the game yesterday, everything was going well and then it didn't at the end. And that felt like that was a pattern that happened throughout the season. What do you think was the issue in a lot of fourth quarters this year? Was there some sort of commonality that you found?

PASCAL SIAKAM: I think, like, again, like, we didn't take care of the ball, most of the time. If sometimes we didn't make shots. Little mistakes there and there on defense. And you have guys on the other team get going and, you know, like, not be able to stop them. So I think it's a combination of a lot of things that I feel like, to be able to win consistently in the league, we have to be able to do throughout a whole game.

And we just, again, like, have good periods of time where we have that and then times where we don't.

- Are there things, personally, that you want to improve, in terms of performing, especially in the fourth quarter?

PASCAL SIAKAM: No, I think, for me, like, again, like, I haven't really thought of anything really. Like, I have to go back and see. But I just-- I just feel like just be myself.

- Thanks.

- What's that process of kind of determining where you want to work on in the off season is? Do you sit down with Rico? Do you kind of have stuff in your head that already comes to mind?

PASCAL SIAKAM: I have stuff. Like, again, you watch film. And there's things that, consistently during the season, you try to improve. And some things are hard to do during the season, you know? So I think sometimes it's also mental.

Like, just being able to make some adjustments. And again, like I said, like, some of the things is-- I think that even with 3's, like, I think my mechanics is good. Like, I think, most of the time, if I make more than three or four or five 3's, like it's-- like, it's a high-scoring game, guaranteed. You know, so I think just, like, more than anything is just the mental space of just-- sometimes, just doing it, you know? Like, and I think, for me, sometimes it's like I feel like I can always get to my spot and some of those spots, like, I feel like it's easy to just do it.

And sometimes I just don't even think of shooting 3's. So just little things like that, like, that I feel like could change. And those are things that you can choose to try to change during the season. But I think, sometimes, it's a complete, like, mindset shift that needs to happen.

- Pascal, as you're striving to get better and better-- like last night, Jalen Rose said you're the best player in the league no one talks about. Draymond had a lot of praise for you recently. Like, do you take those comments from players in the league right now, former players, as a sign that you're headed in the right direction? Like, how do you--

PASCAL SIAKAM: Yeah, no, you appreciate it, for sure. Because I think that, again, obviously, is not something that I'm looking for, but like, it's appreciated. And for me, I think the-- I just want to continue to get better and continue to work. And hopefully, it shows out there. And that's kind of like my mindset.

And yeah, when you have people that watch the game and understand the game, you know, like, see that or recognize it, yeah, it feels-- it feels good.

- Pascal, have you thought about locking in a long-term future with this team? And what will go into your decision when it comes to extension talks?

PASCAL SIAKAM: Yeah. Like, again, it's something that we haven't really talked about. Like, I feel like this thing just happened. So I just-- I don't know what's going to happen. But obviously, like, this is, what, it was year 7 for me?

Like, being here, like, this feels like, you know, like it's part of me. Like, it's probably the most I've been somewhere, outside of Cameroon. Like, and-- yeah, like, it feels-- it feels like home. And I definitely love to be in Toronto. And it's a part of who I am, as a person.

I feel like they've seen me grow. And yeah, like, this feels-- this feels like home. So I don't-- I don't-- I don't have those answers. And I don't know what's going to happen. But I do know that, though.

- Fred was saying that this team needs a new identity. That you guys have kind of got all you can out of that chaos style of play. Do you feel that way?

PASCAL SIAKAM: Like-- Fred said that?

- Yeah.

PASCAL SIAKAM: I don't know, again. My favorite line is, like, yeah, like, I just-- there's people that get paid some money to do that. And it's mostly not part of my job. But whenever it is, there's going to be discussions. And if my input is allowed or, once we get to even that, like, there's going to be conversation to be made.

But for me, like, that's just not something that I feel like I need to discuss.

- Fred-- some players in the league have spoken openly about how they're motivated by winning championships and other players say they're not necessarily always motivated by winning championships, they just focus on that the here and now. And you know, where do you think you lie on that, and obviously, somebody's already won the championship, but what's it like, the motivation to try and get [INAUDIBLE]?

PASCAL SIAKAM: Yeah, no, I think-- I think it's always winning. And I don't-- I mean, yeah, it's hard. Because it's like, I don't think there's people that go out there and they don't want to win. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, and maybe sometimes the way things are said or whatever.

But I think that everyone goal is usually to win. Like, I mean, it should be. I mean, that's my goal. Like, I want to win. That's why I play.

That's one of the reason why I play the game. And there's nothing better than winning. Like, it's just-- because you put so much-- especially for me, I put so much into the work and everything. It's like, why am I going to put so much, you know, like, and not have any, like, reward for me? Like, which, for me, I feel like it's winning.

Like, it brings you joy. It brings you happiness. Like, I-- like, those years or those times, like, when we have good season and we play good basketball and we're winning, like, it's probably the happiest that I'll be, as a person, as a player. So like, that feeling is just-- it's better than anything really. Like, you can go out there and you can make-- you can make a lot of money.

But like, if there's no, like, joy in to doing what you're doing, it's just like, like, what's the point? Like, and I feel like that's a type of person that I am. Like, winning brings me joy. And obviously, I want to make the most money that I can make. But I also want-- I want to enjoy it.

Like, I want to have fun. And if it's not fun for me, like, it's just-- there's no point of doing it. And I think that, for me, fun relates with winning.

- We'll do one more in English and then we're going to go for two in French.

- Pascal--

[INTERPOSING VOICES]

- Sorry-- the beginning of the year, [INAUDIBLE] you know, there's some comments around Nick and his future as coaching here [INAUDIBLE]? Do you have any insight or thoughts on that? Did it affect the team when that was the talks kind of filtered up [INAUDIBLE]?

PASCAL SIAKAM: Right. Yeah, again, it's like, when one day is trades or there's trade-- I mean, it's what happens, right? Like, I think, as we understand that, like-- or at least, we should understand it, like, that's what the league is going to be. Like, I don't think, for me, personally, because I can really only speak for myself. Like, I don't think it changed anything.

You know, it was just, like, the same feeling when there's a lot of trade rumors about me. Like, that's the same feeling that I have. I deal with whatever is in front of me, every single day. And that's what I focus on. And I think that those other things, like I said, not part of my job description.

And I try not to worry about things that I can't control. Obviously, I had a long career with Nick and him being here, like, huge part of who I am, as a player. And just, like, you know, like, kind of like used to just him being around. And yeah, like, I don't-- I don't know what the future holds, but I try to focus on the present of what's out here right now.

- Go ahead and wrap up.

- Pascal, [SPEAKING FRENCH]

PASCAL SIAKAM: [SPEAKING FRENCH]

- [SPEAKING FRENCH]

PASCAL SIAKAM: [SPEAKING FRENCH]

- Thank you.