Tyler Seguin flashes evil smile after knocking over delicious beer

Allow me to quote Skipper, the endearing and knowledgable leader of the penguins in Dreamworks Animation’s 2005 masterpiece Madagascar, when he said, “cute and cuddly boys, cute and cuddly.”

While the flightless bird was directing his squad after getting busted by New York City police for escaping the zoo, he might as well have been instructing Tyler Seguin before his game against the Calgary Flames on Wednesday night.

During warmups, the Dallas Stars, um, star, noticed a female spectator had placed an adult refreshment on the edge of the boards while taking in the action. To add some hilarity to the situation, Seguin purposely skated into the glass where the beverage was sitting.

Classic.

After seeing what was probably somewhere between $10 and $15 hit the ground, the victim of this heinous crime was upset. Most men would panic at this point, but Seguin went on to show the world that he is a champ. The 26-year-old flashed that perfect smile in her direction — a grin that’s basically impossible to stay mad at.

Bold move. But, what can I say? It’s simultaneously beautiful, inspiring and sickening.

Having seen this and heading out to a local establishment with a few friends after my shift, I decided to try this move out myself. So, I walked up to a woman at the bar, knocked the full beer that she was holding right out of her hand without a word and smiled in her direction.

To make a long story short, this strategy didn’t work nearly as well for me. She “wasn’t impressed” and her boyfriend (who I was completely unaware of) might have “roughed me up a bit” before I was “politely thrown out of the building.”

I guess things are a little different when you’re not raking in $9.85 million a season starting in 2019-20 and your appearance can only be described as “a solid six after a few drinks.”

Just to rub some salt in the wounds of the average Joe, Seguin went on to assist on Jamie Benn’s second period goal before netting the overtime winner in his side’s 4-3 victory over the Flames.

Jerk.

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