Stick the trident in the Mariners — they’re done, and they need non-Dipoto eyes

The Mariners’ 2024 season has been described with many words, from disappointing to frustrating and everything in between.

I’d contend that it’s the worst in franchise history. How can it be the worst for a team that has had five 100-loss seasons since its inception in 1977? Aren’t the Mariners 69-69, the definition of halfway decent?

It’s still the worst because this year’s team has the best rotation in baseball, five starters who could be aces on many other MLB teams. With this kind of pitching, the Mariners would have had a reasonable chance to finally become the last team to appear in a World Series.

But they won’t even make the playoffs thanks to the weakest lineup in franchise history, which is quite the feat given their low standard of play over the years.

No Mariners team has ever finished a season averaging .216, but with 24 games to go, that’s where this one is, feeble as can be. That’s why this is the worst season — they’ve flat out blown a terrific opportunity.

They enter tonight’s game in Oakland a full six games behind the Astros in the AL West, a division they led by 10 games on June 18th. The Mariners lost again Monday night to fall to 25-38 since they were 44-31 more than two months ago.

It happened on a night when three former Mariners lit it up: Teo Hernandez went 5-for-5 for the Dodgers, Ty France went 4-for-4 for the Reds, and Eugenio Suarez went 3-for-4 for the Diamondbacks.

I understand that baseball has turned into acronym heaven, featuring alphabetical measuring sticks along with phrases no one ever talked about but are commonplace now. I’m personally sick of launch angles and exit velocity. Let’s bench WAR and WRC+ too and focus on one letter: K.

The Mariners have struck out 1,406 times this season, putting them on a pace to become the all-time strikeout kings. The Twins hold the record of 1,654 strikeouts last season.

I don’t dislike strikeouts, I hate them. It’s always been a sign of complete failure to me. But they’ve somehow become acceptable in today’s game.

I appreciate that new manager Dan Wilson continues to stick up for his players, saying that they “battled to the end” in Monday night’s 5-4 loss to the A’s. With all due respect, Dan, no they didn’t. They struck out in their last five at-bats.

Can we agree that Scott Servais and the two fired hitting coaches weren’t the problem with this team? The Mariners are 5-5 since Wilson took over and averaging .215 since Edgar Martinez returned as the hitting coach.

Making Wilson the permanent manager instead of an interim one was a ridiculous move. When the Mariners fall short of the playoffs, you can argue that Wilson didn’t have the time to incorporate his philosophy. Give him a full spring training and 2025 season before passing judgment.

But team president Jerry Dipoto will be fired after the Mariners fall short of the playoffs for the eighth time in his nine years here. Wouldn’t you want Dipoto’s replacement to have his choice as the new manager? But now he’ll be stuck with Wilson whether he feels he’s the right guy for the job or not.

When Dipoto gets pink slipped, I hope he finds out the way that Servais did, from some breaking news text alert on his phone, not in a face-to-face with John Stanton, one of the team’s owners. And when Dipoto leaves, I hope he takes that “Control the Zone” B.S. with him. You cannot preach the importance of controlling the zone when you swing at pitches in the other batter’s box and watch others go by that are right down the middle.

While he’s at it, take the trident too. Sorry, I’m over the trident celebrations in the dugout after home runs, particularly the solo shots that happen when the Mariners are five runs behind. If anything, they should use that thing to put a new spin on an old cliche - stick a trident in them, they’re done.

Truth of the matter, the Mariners suffer from another acronym - LOFT, Lack Of Talent, and I think you know what the F stands for.

The new team president will have to come up with an entirely new infield if he expects the Mariners to be more competitive next year. No one wants to see Josh Rojas and Luis Urias at third base or Jorge Polanco at second base anymore. I love Justin Turner, but he’s 39, which means the Mariners will probably be shopping for a new first baseman.

And can we stop it already with J.P. Crawford as the team’s starting shortstop? I mean, really, I know he’s a popular player, but he’s not good enough to be out there every day. Since returning from the injured list, Crawford is 0-for-14 and 2-for-his-last-34. How he continues to be the leadoff hitter is mystifying to be kind or stupid to be more accurate.

The outfield seems to be set with Randy Arozarena in left, Julio Rodriguez in center and Victor Robles in right. Then again, I’m not sold on Arozarena just yet, and Robles has been mostly terrific, but his history says he’s not as good as he’s been this year with the Mariners.

The frugal owners, or better put, the cheap owners will remain an issue for the new man in charge of baseball operations. But as Danny O’Neil detailed last week in The News Tribune, it’s time for a new set of eyes and new approach to satisfy a justifiably fed-up fan base.

Jim Moore has covered Washington’s sports scene from every angle for multiple news outlets. He appears Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at 10 a.m. on Jason Puckett’s podcast at PuckSports.com. You can find him on X (formerly Twitter) @cougsgo.