New Rangers Theme Must Be 'Playoffs Or Bust'

Here's the deal with your Rangers in a nutshell: Igor Shesterkin's goalkeeping can carry this team only so far.

That is, as far as Dallas.

After that they survive with a mediocre attack, Hail Mary defense and – as shown against the Stars – a maximum of luck. No more, no less.

Meanwhile, coach Peter Laviolette has no choice but gamble on goalie Jonathan Quick to stop the hot (what else?) Devils today in Newark.

"What Lavvy really should do – but he can't – is start Shesterkin against this high-scoring team," says The Old Scout, "but that would be too much for Igor."

Not that Quick is a flub; far from it; but he figures to have his hands and pads full today, what with the Devils attack being what it is – scorching.

Granted, that we've seen this Blueshirt team rebound before but last night's 3-1 collapse against the Canes left the Garden oozing with boos.

My trusty associate Solon Mihas put it this way about the wealthiest team in the NHL: "Shesterkin seemed to be the only Ranger who came to play."

The Canes' goalie – Pyotr Kochetkov – not only made 22 saves but also totalled two assists which means he outscored the entire Rangers sextet. (Embarrassing; that's what!)

Since Emperor Igor was the only Rangers star, I asked Solon to pick "The Worst Rangers" and he wasted no time fingering a pair.

"Braden Schneider and Chad Ruhwedel," Mihas declared, "because they didn't cover their men in front of the net. That resulted in both second period Carolina goals."

Speaking of winning goals, does anyone in Rangerville remember a fella named Jack Roslovic? Of course you do since he was the once-Ranger forward Chris Drury unceremoniously dumped after last season.

Jumpin' Jack – wisely nabbed by Carolina – is having a super season; better, in fact, than most Rangers.

More reason to weep: The Rangers are oh-for-a-dozen on the power play in the last five games.

Meanwhile, slumping Fat Cat Alexis Lafreniere got a double minor for mistaking his stick for a toothpick and chipping Roslovic's two front teeth.

Big Al is so happy with his new contract that he's now a minus-13 for the season.

Oh, yeah, Mika Zibanejad showed up – in body, that is. As for his spirit, meh! (But give the guy some credit; at least he shows up for post-game interviews.)

Mihas leaves us with a revision: "I actually would give my 'Worst Player Award' to the entire Rangers team."

He's leaving out Shesty who now is on his own level. It's called Planet Superior.

Now, for the Devils in Newark and a Quick turnaround! (They should be so lucky! Or Quicky!!)