Rangers Off-The-Wall Half-Season Awards

Being that this easily is the craziest half-season in Blueshirts history, t's only appropriate for The Maven to distribute crazy, half-season Rangers awards, citations and whatnot. Here goes:

1. MOST VALUABLE PLAYER: WILL CUYLLE: While his neighbors sleep, Willie comes to play every night. He plays exactly 293 times harder than Mika Zibanejad and a teensy-weensy bit harder than Jimmy Vesey.

2. MOST UN-VALUABLE PLAYER: MIKA: Who else? Runner-Up has to be Matt Rempe wherever he may be and what he plans on doing if the Rangers dare bring him back.

3. BIGGEST STORY: IGOR SHESTERKIN: While the former modestly-paid goalie let Alexis Lafreniere get his modest fortune first, Igor showed the MSG bankers what a dollar deke is all about. Shesterkin is so rich you should not hesitate to ask him for $25,000 for a cup of coffee. Then advise Iggy that you want to have it in Brazil!

4. BYE-BYE BLUES STORY: JACOB TROUBA: Ov vay what a headache this turned out to be. Jake The Rake didn't want to go to Detroit and Chris Drury didn't want him around anymore. The tug-of-war was won by both. Drury got him out of there while Jake escaped from The Chamber of Horrors.

5. UNFINISHED BYE-BYE BLUES STORY: CHRIS KREIDER: Drury wants him out in the worst way but no GM in his right mind wants One-Assist-Chris. If the WHA still was around, this pure Ranger would have wound up with the New England Whalers.

6. BLUE CROSS-BLUE SHIELD AWARD: FIERY FIL CHYTIL: That The Comeback Kid still is alive is enough cause for celebrating.

7. LIFETIME GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARD: MATT REMPE: And everybody knows the reason why except, perhaps, Matt Rempe.