Vancouver Mayor Gregor Robertson made good on his playoff bet with Calgary's mayor today, donning a Flames jersey and reading a poem written by Naheed Nenshi that slams Vancouver's Sedin twins, Nickelback, and leaky condos.
The mayors made a three-part bet over the first-round playoff series, where the losing mayor had to wear the opposing team's jersey, read a poem by the winner, and make a food bank donation.
The poem, titled "Rebuild," didn't rhyme, but it did get a few laughs at Vancouver city council.
"The twins can't score, rebuild!" read Robertson from Nenshi's poem.
"Sometimes, sometimes the condos leak ... Nickelback moves in and young people move out."
"Pucks fall in our net, like cherry blossoms in spring, very pretty," said Robertson.
"Maybe rethink the whole white waving towels thing. Why surrender all the time?" asked Nenshi in his poem, referring to "towel power," a Vancouver Canucks playoff tradition dating back to 1982.
After a few more digs at Vancouver's Lululemon and coffee habits, Nenshi finished his poem with a statement Vancouver's mayor would half agree with: "Go Flames! Vote Transit!"
Full text of Naheed Nenshi's poem Rebuild
On the edge of the country
Where the mountains meet the ocean
We're trying to build something new.
Dare we say … something better.
And that's good.
But sometimes …
The condos leak.
The cauldron fails to rise.
Nickelback moves in and young people move out.
(Can we rebuild for that?)
The twins can't score.
But these kids in red (who are they?) can.
Diving's not a Winter Olympic sport?
And we're still at zero cups and counting.
(not Starbucks cups)
Pucks fall in our net
Like cherry blossoms in spring
So very pretty
(Maybe we should rethink the whole waving white towels thing?
Why surrender all the time?)
Bieksa's trash talk
No good for hockey
Set off fireworks!
Ours is the longest golf season in the country!
And we're not Edmonton.