How the Dallas Cowboys continue to defy the law of averages. It must change, right?

Albert Einstein died five years before the Dallas Cowboys were born, and somehow his finger prints are all over this franchise.

Pretty sure the globally renowned scientist would not have been a fan of the ‘Boys, and not because he lived closer to the home of the New York Giants, or the New York Jets.

Quite unintentionally, the Cowboys have fallen face first into the pattern of following an observation that Einstein is often credited having said: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”

This fun generality is often angrily thrown at the Cowboys by fans, and media members, immediately in the wake of yet another disappointing finish to a season, by no later than mid January. It’s both a back door, and front door, shot at team owner/president/GM Jerry Jones.

The team has not reached a conference title game since 1995, and as they prepare to play the Browns in Cleveland to begin the regular season on Sunday, there are a few particles and crumbs of hope they will end that streak in early 2025.

Maybe We’ll Get Lucky just doesn’t have much of Knute Rockne tone.

In an effort to find some hope and optimism, and relying on science, the Cowboys have also fallen face first into a theory as conceived by someone far less renowned as Einstein, but a significant contributor.

You may not know Jakob Bernoulli, but there is a decent chance you are familiar with his work, specifically his “Probability theory.” You may know it better as “law of averages.”

Bernoulli was a Swiss mathematician who lived in the 1600 and 1700s, and his studies made life hell for teenagers the world over. He is credited with introducing calculus (If only I could get my hands on him).

This guy would have been a big fan of the Cowboys. Think Rowdy with a calculator, or a slide rule.

Bernoulli analyzed games of chance rooted in the idea that if you “throw the dice” enough times, eventually you will get the desired result.

As much as the Cowboys seem to be following Einstein’s concept of insanity, maybe we have all missed what they are really doing is patterning themselves after Bernoulli. They simply have not thrown the dice enough.

Since 2005, the Cowboys have consistently been a “good” to a “very good” team. They’ve had 12 winning seasons in that stretch, including eight years where they won at least 10 games.

Wouldn’t you think that in this stretch the law of averages would work in their favor one time that they would at least stumble into the one, or two postseason, wins necessary to reach a conference title game?

Since the Cowboys last reached the conference title game, every other NFC team but one has made it to the NFL’s “Final Four.” That one is team in Washington D.C. That franchise has gone through three different names since the Cowboys last reached the NFC game.

In this stretch, the Rams have moved from St. Louis to Los Angeles and reached the title game twice.

Hell, the Detroit Lions have now been in more NFC title games than the Cowboys this century. Since 2000, the Arizona Cardinals have made it to NFC championship Sunday more than the Cowboys.

On the AFC side, the Bengals have reached two conference title games in this span. The only other franchises that are on a worse streak are the Miami Dolphins, Cleveland Browns and Houston Texans.

The difference between the Cowboys and the rest of that sad lot is they have been better across the board, and yet the postseason success looks the same.

Since they last reached the NFC title game, in 1995, the Cowboys are 0-6 in divisional round games; in that stretch includes the Dez Bryant “The Catch?” game in Green Bay, and Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers miracle throw to win at AT&T Stadium in 2016.

The Cowboys have become a franchise whose identity is anchored not by their ability to win Super Bowls, but by their consistent inability to even come within a game of it.

On first, or even second or third, glance the critic says they are in this maddening position because they are doing what Einstein says; changing nothing while expecting different results.

On fourth, or maybe 109th glance, the optimist says what they are really doing is following Bernoulli’s law of probability; that, eventually, by throwing enough dice they’ll eventually win it again.

For now, for the sake of our sanity, hope the Cowboys are going with Bernoulli even if we know by mid January what they’ve really done is confirm Einstein had the Cowboys pegged.