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Andrei Arshavin conducts greatest Q&A ever, part XX

Dirty Tackle

Though this series only sometimes veers into the pornographic, it seems fitting that we've reached the XX milestone. Mostly because the thoughts that go through the minds of the people who ask Andrei/ey Arshavin questions on his official website are not safe for life. But that's what makes this all so special. Let's get back in it.

1. From fedotov
Hi Andrey!
You're my favorite player since 2006, I'm 13 now so I've been supporting you since I was 8 years old, I'm from Kemerovo :) How long are planning to play professional football? I've been at your football match against Valuev, thanks for coming to Kemerovo and my last question: are you are registered on the social networking site Vkontakte??
AA: You asked me the questions I'd answered before but since you are from Kemerovo :) I'll answer.
1. Till I'm 35
2. In the social networks my name is used by crooks. You can pass them this.

Crooks! Hear that @Andrei_Arshavin? You are a crook! Once the real Andrei turns 35 he will surely devote his life after football to bringing you to justice.

{ysp:more}

2. From dfdf334
Andrey, what do you think about skinheads? It's just their number in Russia
reached 90 000 ... and more and more often they begin to kill black people,
Chinese, Jews and other people of non-Russian appearance ..
AA: Only God gives us life and only He can take it away.

Unless you're one of the crooks impersonating Andrei on Facebook. Then he will take it away with extreme prejudice. He meaning Andrei.

3. From sherpiv
Andrey, I am your fan, I am 11 years old, my name is Daniyal, I live in
Makhachkala .... my request - please come to Makhachkala, we
will be very happy .. and I think Roberto Carlos will be glad to see you, you also can have some rest by the Caspian sea) All the best in your career, thank you in advance!
AA: I've been to Makhachkala many times. Thank you for your invitation.

Andrei does not need your invitations to visit Makhachkala, silly sherpiv. He comes and goes as he pleases. He also does not feel the need to acknowledge Roberto Carlos.

6. From Akishkin
I've been asking questions many times, but couldn't find a single answer. In what order are they posted? Thanks in advance for your reply.
AA: The answers are arranged in the order I answer them and you
ask them. Well, but this order can be broken by the person who posts the answers to the questions you ask and I answer. Something like that))))

Andrei evades your impatience by making your brain melt.

11. From samotlor13
Andrey, when you first came to the airport and your flight
got canceled because of the fog, you were talking on the phone in the airport parking lot. Do you remember this moment?
AA: Yes, I remember.

I'm pretty sure that's the moment samotlor13 began stalking you, Andrei. This was your warning. LOOK BEHIND YOU!

12. From Damirs
Andrey I'm interested whether you've ever hunted animals. Answer me, please
AA: No. There have been many invitations. But I will never agree to this. I feel bad about
killing animals.

Andrey has never hunted animals, but, funny enough, samotlor13 is hunting Andrey right now. AGAIN -- PLEASE LOOK BEHIND YOU ANDREY!!

13. From Allmagnus
Andrey, do you consider yourself the best Russian footballer over the past 5
years?
AA: No.

The identity of who Andrei considers the best Russian footballer over the past five years will cost you extra, Allmagnus.

15. From 89531464758
Andrey, as a child I also went to "Smena" (football school) just like you! My coach
was Vilde V.V, I was born in 1979 and I even remember one time going with you to the tournament in Turku! And I remember the way you were playing back then (with a great desire) and I sadly witness how you play now (as if doing a boring job). What's going on, Andrey? Are you tired of everything? Don't you have nothing to aspire to?
AA: No, I'm not tired of football. Turku? Yes, I remember how we
went to the tournament in Finland. What club are you playing for?

BURN! You want to call Andrei out for playing as if he's doing a boring job, 89531464758? Well what club are you playing for? Because Andrei is playing for Arsenal and you're still hung up on a tournament in Turku from who knows when. So eat it.

89531464758 does kind of have a point, though.

16. From KaTe13
Andrey, When you were in school, did you read "War and Peace" till the very end?
AA: When I was in school, no. Back then, I managed only about 50-70 pages. I've watched the movie back in school. It helped me to pass tests and write essays on Leo Tolstoy's work. At the final school exam I chose to write an essay on another writer's work.

That writer? Steven Spielberg.

17. From Magomedov938
Andrey, salam. It's me again. My dream has always been to play for the Russian national team, tell me please how to get there, I train a lot. What do you think, is it possible for me to get there?
AA: Dreams Come True.

But not yours.

18. From Magomedov938
Salam, Andrey. I'm your fan and I love the way you play. I play for
Anji- Youth. My position is just like yours - left-winger. Could you
give me a couple of tips, please.
AA: A couple of tips? Not a problem. Get over to the flank. Send a lobbed ball, preferably to the one of yours.

In case you can't tell by Andrei's consecutive bits of half-assed advice, Magomedov938, he's really not taking your queries seriously. You'll have to save him from samotlor13 if you want the good stuff.

19. From sasha2002
Have you ever played in the orange boots?
AA: No. Those boots are of my competitors.

Not anymore, Andrei. Not anymore.

20. From Stu314
Hello, Andrey. My name is Nastya, I'm 19 years old. I understand that I'm taking your time, but I think you are the person who can help me. I have a little brother Daniil. He is 10 years old. He loves and understands football but he has a small learning problem. In my opinion — it's quite normal for a guy to get 5 unsatisfactory marks a week, but my parents are not happy with it. You've repeatedly been recognized as the best player of the Russian championship, you are the star of the Russian football. Could you suggest how to help my little brother to improve his results in school?
Thank you, goodbye)
AA: In our football school, we had pretty tough rules: you were not allowed to play football, until you've improved your results. Therefore, as everybody wanted to play, we tried to study well. And if such things happened, when the teacher gave us poor evaluation, the guys tried to correct the situation very fast.

In other words, tell your brother to stop trying to read books and starting watching movies. You're welcome.

Photo: Getty