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Luc Robitaille statue; Red Wings' cruel summer; Laich on Caps' rock-bottom (Puck Headlines)

Harrison Mooney
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Sidney Crosby? That's Dion Phaneuf, dammit.

Here are your Puck Headlines: A glorious collection of news and views collected from the greatest blogosphere in sports and the few, the proud, the mainstream hockey media.

• Let's talk about Sidney Crosby's new Bleacher Creature, and how it looks like Evgeni Malkin or Dion Phaneuf instead. [Bleacher Creatures]

• There's a Luc Robitaille statue coming to the Staples Center. It will move only slightly slower than Luc Robitaille. [LA Kings Insider]

• Examining the risks of a long-term contract for Bobby Ryan. [Silver Seven Sens]

• The Red Wings have had a lame summer, and lame summers beget lame autumns. [Detroit Sports Site]

• Sean McIndoe on the NHL's new super-extensions, and why they're not as concerning as they seem. [Grantland]

• Brooks Laich on missing the playoffs in Washington, and how great it was, since it got Adam Oates and George McPhee fired, essentially: "My honest opinion is not making the playoffs last year might have been the greatest day going forward for our organization, because I really think it made us all take a look in the mirror and at our failures and why we are failing. If we would have made the playoffs and lost in the first or second round it would have been the same old story, but you wouldn't have had that hard, brutally honest look at yourselves to realize why you are failing." [NHL]

• Speaking of the Capitals, Rod Langway likes what they've done to their defense. [ESPN]

• Now that hockey analytics are here to stay, what's next for them? [Pension Plan Puppets

• Remembering the other Pittsburgh Pirates -- the hockey Pirates. Their contribution to the NHL was pretty important: line changes. It saddens me that they're not around anymore under their original name: the Pittsburgh Yellow Jackets. Imagine how great it would be if hockey had a Blue Jackets and a Yellow Jackets, sort of like how baseball has a White Sox and a Red Sox. [SB Nation

• The Dallas Stars have announced their plans to purchase the Texas Stars. I think I speak for everybody when I say: they didn't own them already? [Stars]

• Bauer Hockey sues Bauer-Emerson Prep Academy, a hockey intensive private school with which it has no affiliation, to change its name. [Star Tribune]

• Five reasons to be excited about another outdoor game in California. I offer a sixth: more awkward photos of Gary Bettman with Gene Simmons. [The Hockey News]

•  A look at the Islanders' defense corps. Will it be enough for them to compete next season? [The Hockey Writers]

• John Tavares talks about the longest stretch he's ever gone between hockey games. Poor guy is itching to get back out there. [Islanders]

• Speaking of the Islanders, their Summer of Disappointment entry only scratched the surface of their unfortunate history, so here is an addendum. [Lighthouse Hockey]

• Alex Burrows on losing his spot with the Sedins to Radim Vrbata: Whatever, the Sedins are dumb anyway. Okay, his actual quote is nicer: "The team winning games is way more important than me scoring goals with the twins." [Sportsnet]

• Who would be the best team in a scaled-down, America-only, community-based version of the NHL? My money's on the Wisconsin Clarks, suspect goaltending notwithstanding. [Let's Play Hockey

• Gregory Campbell is willing to transition as Boston's young centres push him to the wall. [The Score]

• Hockey Broad on female hockey fans, which seems like something she'd know about. "Hockey continues to grow its reach, and that fan base is becoming increasingly female - currently around the 40% mark, give or take 3% based on the team. That number gets bigger for other sports: 43% of NFL fans, 46.5% of MLB fans, and 47.2% of MLS fans. If hockey feels it needs cheerleaders in the stands, or pretty girls in tiny outfits as part of the ice-cleaning crews, it is clearly catering to the male demographic which currently makes up about 60% of their fans." [Hockey Broad]

• Antoine Vermette joins the ice bucket challenge.

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