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Cole Hamels once signed a lifetime contract with the San Diego Padres for $1

Yup, this looks legally binding to us.

Sorry, Phillies fans, but it doesn't look like Cole Hamels will be heading to the bargaining table for an extension to keep pitching in Philadelphia anytime soon.

Or at all, in fact, because it looks like he'll have to pitch the rest of his career for his hometown San Diego Padres. For that you can thank Cole's mother, who apparently signed this contract promising her son's prime years to Padres marketing honcho Andy Strasberg for the incredibly team-friendly amount of $1.

Boy, what a terrible break. Just when Hamels thought he'd cash in his 3-1, 2.73 start to the year for a contract worth north of $100 million comes this revelation on Gaslamp Ball of his indentured servitude to a team he recently criticized for having fairweather fans.  He might want to get a lawyer and the player's union to look into this deal, but yeah, it looks pretty airtight. Hope he stashed away some of that illegal signing bonus he got from the Phillies.

Here's Hamels' reaction to the news below:

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