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Sochi 2014: What to watch, Day 8 (February 15)

First of all, here's a synopsis of tonight's episode of Sochi Seinfeld, on 3CP1, direct from the Russian TV Guide:

"George attempts to swindle some Olympic infrastructure kickback cash through Vandaley Industries. A Latvian skeleton coach tries to recruit Kramer and gives him a tryout. Elaine and Jerry sneak into Canada House but their fake Canadian accents get them into trouble."

Sounds like the gang's got another slew of wacky adventures on tap.

Meanwhile, here's what to look for over at the Olympic venues, on Day 8:

Canada's Charles Hamelin goes for gold in the 1,000 metre speed skating romp as he tries to stay on track to tie the record for most Olympic medals won by a Canadian. Had the possibility of being the most decorated Canadian Olympian ever, but his little brother Francois fell during the 5,000 metre relay, squashing those dreams. Wait 'til mom hears about this. Hamelin is joined by fellow Canadians Olivier Jean and Charle Cournoyer in this event. Cournoyer?! Wonder if he's related to Montreal Canadiens' great Yvan Cournoyer? That guy could really fly, eh? He was nicknamed "The Roadrunner." That's how fast he was. Be great if Charle was related to him. UPDATE: I have found no evidence that they are related. 6 am ET, On CBC.

Elsewhere on the oval, Canada's Denny Morrison and the United States' Shani Davis renew their rivalry in the 1,500 metre race. Morrison once held the world record in this event and then Davis busted it. NOTE: I did not spend any time researching whether either of these men are related to Yvan Cournoyer. 8:30 am ET, on TSN.

"Do you believe in... the notion that this rivalry used to mean more?! Yes!!" While, politically speaking, a hockey game between the United States and Russia isn't nearly as dramatic as it used to be (back in the day when it was a stand-in for nuclear war), from a hockey standpoint? Huge. Two of the top end contenders for gold at this tournament square off in round robin play and with rosters chock full of NHL super stars, this'll be a dandy. For old times' sake, please have Sylvester Stallone and Dolph Lundgren perform the ceremonial face off. 7:30 am ET, on CBC.

The women's hockey competition is at the quarter-final stage, with Switzerland taking on Russia. Winner meets Canada in the semi's, so, this is kind of like two minnows in a bucket fighting to the death for the right to be skewered on a fisherman's hook. 7:15 am ET, On Sportsnet. The other two minnows - Finland and Sweden - battle for the right to be bait on the Americans' hook. Just so you know (spoiler alert!!), the inevitable Canada - U.S. final will be played next Thursday at noon. That's okay, but if it's pretty clear no one outside North America can compete at women's hockey, the IOC is gonna start making noise, once again, about dumping it completely from the Olympics. Which would be the chance ski ballet's been waiting for!!

Ski jumping sees Switzerland's Simon Ammann gunning for another double gold performance, like he had in Vancouver. He had a double gold performance in Salt Lake City, in 2002, as well. But nothing in Turin, in 2006. Seems he does really well every second Olympics he appears in so I wouldn't hope for much here. But, 2016 in Pyeongchang, South Korea? Bet BIG, baby. 12:15 pm ET, On Sportsnet.

Good curling, anyone? Canada's Jennifer Jones has skipped her team to a perfect 5 and oh record so far. Jeepers. That's a lot of first rounds bought. She and her teammates take on Japan at midnight, ET, on CBC. Of course, technically, that game actually starts at 9 pm the day before in the Pacific time zone... so... no one on the coast spoil it and tell the east who won! Brad Jacobs and the Canadian men take on Great Britain at 5 am ET, on TSN2. Playoff implications? Yup. I did a whole column on that and there was lots of research, so the least you can do is read it. Okay, you don't have to read it but click on it anyway so the boss thinks I'm popular.

Here's the full viewing schedule for Day 8.