As you’re well aware by now, Joey Votto promised to buy his Cincinnati Reds teammate Zack Cozart a donkey if Cozart was selected to play in the 2017 All-Star game. As it turns out, both were selected — Cozart by vote of the fans as the NL’s starting shortstop and Votto as a reserve. Better than that, Votto has proven to be a man of his word.
A purchase has been made, and a donkey is currently being trained and prepared for Cozart to pick up after the season.
In the meantine, the Reds are venturing into dangerous territory. As of Friday, they started asking fans to help Cozart name his new All-Star donkey. Based on the results of recent instances where teams reached out to fans to help name, well, practically anything, this has a chance to get really silly…. or worse yet absurd.
Remember Falcon McFalconface? That’s what fans suggested the Oakland A’s name their giant falcon kite, which flies above the stadium to help scare off seagulls. That qualifies as silly, and silly is OK for a kite.
But for an animal, and particularly a donkey, we fear the Reds might have to sift through more than silliness. That’s especially true when fans from other teams get involved.
With that said, there is one early suggestion that we like.
— Jay Dee (@JDeCarlo7) July 14, 2017
That’s play off former Reds outfielder Adam Dunn’s old “Donkey” nickname, and we’re all for it.
Of course Donkey McDonkeyface is already being submitted at a record pace.
— Pierce Wortham (@piercewortham) July 14, 2017
If you’re more creative than that, you can submit your suggestion to firstname.lastname@example.org. Just know this isn’t a contest. At least not yet.
In conjunction with this endeavor, the Reds also held an unofficial “Donkey Day” at the Great American Ballpark before Saturday’s game against the Washington Nationals. That’s where a donkey named Amos was on hand to help honor the Reds three All-Star representatives: Cozart, Votto and head athletic trainer Steve Baumann.
That’s a good donkey.
The donkey pooped.
— Zach Buchanan (@ZachENQ) July 15, 2017
Well, for the most part.
Not that anyone cares in Cincinnati. Donkeymania is running wild.
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