One of the most glaring examples of the pitiable state of our union occurred Wednesday, when Rudy Giuliani—a soulless vampire who once married his cousin, tried to subvert democracy, and was caught on camera by Borat grabbing his junk in front of what he thought was a young female reporter—was revealed to be an upcoming contestant on The Masked Singer, a reality show where washed-up celebs sing in animal costumes and an anti-vaxxer, the guy sued into oblivion over his rapey anthem, that funny fella from The Hangover, and Nicole Scherzinger guess who it is.
“Speaking of garbage, you know the show The Masked Singer? OK. Well, the new season doesn’t premiere until next month, but the identity of one of the singers has been revealed, and his name is: Rudy Giuliani,” said Jimmy Kimmel on his late-night show Thursday.
He added, “The guy who’s trying to destroy our country? He’s singing on a show!”
Yes, according to Deadline, Giuliani was unmasked as a contestant in an upcoming Season 7 episode of the Fox show, leading judges Ken Jeong and Robin Thicke to walk off in disgust (only to later return). And you thought the show had reached its nadir with Sarah Palin’s performance of “Baby Got Back!”
“You know, the only gang who should be unmasking Rudy Giuliani is the gang from Scooby-Doo. Let’s find out who the real traitor is!” cracked Kimmel.
“How does this even happen?” he continued. “I mean, a lot of people at Fox had to sign off on this. Not one of them was like, ‘Hey, maybe we shouldn’t have the guy who is under investigation for helping to plot an insurrection singing on our show?’”
Giuliani, former President Donald Trump’s one-time consigliere, has been subpoenaed by the Jan. 6 congressional committee investigating the Capitol insurrection. He’s also still being sued for billions by Dominion and Smartmatic for spreading bogus claims about their voting machines following Trump’s 2020 election loss.
“Only Rudy Giuliani would try to overthrow the government, break wind loudly in court, sweat hair dye all over one press conference, have another one next to a dildo store, and then try to rehabilitate his image by singing ‘Shake Your Groove Thing’ dressed as a pineapple,” cracked Kimmel.
The late-night host then took direct aim at Fox for hosting this travesty: “The Fox network really should be ashamed of themselves. They should have another show after The Masked Singer that night called The Masked Executives. All the Fox executives come out in costumes, the one who green-lit this idea takes off the mask and gets voted out of television forever.”