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Forde-Yard Dash: Where blowhards like Maryland booster Rick Jaklitsch can take a hike

Forty names, games, teams and minutiae making news in college football, where previously uptight Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz continues to get in touch with his inner YOLO gambler while his team takes the Floyd of Rosedale trophy for a fourth straight year):

[More Dash: Heisman race | Assistants in trouble | Notre Dame’s easy path]

FOURTH QUARTER

FIRST OFF THE PLANE, NOW PREFERABLY OFF THE PLANET

Dash kudos to Maryland (31) players who raised objection to the inclusion of booster/insensitive lout/general blowhard Rick Jaklitsch on the team plane to play Michigan over the weekend. Jaklitsch was left off the charter flight.

The reason the players didn’t want the longtime booster and former president of the Terrapin Club around: In an interview with the Maryland student paper, Jaklitsch placed much of the blame for Maryland player Jordan McNair’s death last spring on McNair himself.

“As much as we hate to say this, Jordan didn’t do what Jordan was supposed to do,” Jaklitsch told The Diamondback. “A trainer like Wes Robinson thinks a kid’s properly hydrated and runs a drill set up for kids that are properly hydrated, and when the kid didn’t drink the gallon he knew he had to drink, that’s going to send the wrong signal to the person running the drill.”

That soulless comment conveniently overlooked the multiple admitted mistakes the Maryland training staff made in treating/not treating McNair for heat stroke, which contributed directly to his death after a conditioning workout. But Jaklitsch was more interested in playing the pass-the-blame game to a dead player because he wants suspended coach D.J. Durkin (32) reinstated.

In an interview with The Washington Post this week, Jaklitsch took his ouster from the travel party with something approaching equanimity. And some more lack of perspective.

“I’ve been on trips for 20 years. I’ll be on trips for another 20 years, hopefully,” he told The Post. “They could have used me. I’m still undefeated when I’m on the sidelines. But I refuse to be selfish. I’ll do whatever it takes to support Maryland. If I can support them by not being there, I’ll not be there. It’s all about the players, it’s all about the coaches, it’s all about my Terps.”

What a hero.

Maryland mascot Testudo runs on the field as the team is introduced before a game against Towson last year. (AP)
Maryland mascot Testudo runs on the field as the team is introduced before a game against Towson last year. (AP)

THE PRODIGAL BASEBALL PLAYER WHO CATCHES BALLS FROM HIS BROTHER

Idaho State’s 62-28 rout of Idaho on Saturday didn’t raise much awareness outside that state, but it was noteworthy for a couple of reasons:

* It was the first time the Bengals had beaten Idaho since 1995, and it came in the Vandals’ first season back down at the FCS level after playing FBS football for 22 seasons. That was an unprecedented self-demotion, and suffice to say it isn’t going very well for the 2-3 Vandals.

* It was Part 2 of a very bad weekend for the Petrino brothers. Bobby was demolished at home by Georgia Tech on Friday night, then Paul, the coach at Idaho, took this beatdown. (At least neither was fired, unlike what befell the Stoops brothers Sunday).

* It was a great game for another set of siblings, Idaho State quarterback Tanner Gueller (33) and his brother Mitch (34). They have a story of their own.

In May 2016, Mitch Gueller’s baseball dream died — he’d been the No. 54 pick in the 2012 Major League Baseball draft, but after four-plus struggling seasons as a pitcher in the minor leagues, the Philadelphia Phillies released him from the Class-A team he was playing with in New Jersey. Faced with a glum 3,000-mile drive home to Washington, little brother Tanner offered to fly East so they could make the trek in Mitch’s pickup together.

“It was a tough time in his life,” Tanner told The Dash. “That was his career, what he was dead-set on. I figured he could use the company.”

They made some fun out of it, starting with a jaunt into New York City and a bucket-list detour further east to see a game in Fenway Park. Then they went to eat buffalo wings in Buffalo. Eventually they visited their father in Wyoming.

Along the way, Tanner suggested something to his brother: Why don’t you come to Idaho State and play football? Play wide receiver and I’ll throw it to you.

Mitch thought about it for a couple of weeks. He hadn’t played football since high school in 2011, and he’d been a quarterback his last two seasons there. He hadn’t run routes since 2009. But he knew he wanted to go to college, and why not try to play ball a little longer? Especially with your little brother?

Fast forward through the Idaho game and Mitch Gueller has caught 95 collegiate passes for nearly 2,000 yards and 15 touchdowns over 2 1/2 seasons — almost all of it from his brother. He was Idaho State’s leading receiver against Idaho with 184 yards on six catches, as Tanner threw a school-record eight touchdowns. They’re among the most prolific pass-and-catch duos in the FCS ranks, and almost certainly the oldest — Mitch is 24 and Tanner, a fifth-year senior, is 22.

The end of a baseball dream has led to a pretty cool postscript.

Idaho State’s Mitch Gueller catches a pass from his brother, Tanner. (Photo courtesy of Idaho State athletics)
Idaho State’s Mitch Gueller catches a pass from his brother, Tanner. (Photo courtesy of Idaho State athletics)

DESTRUCTIVE TODDLER OF THE WEEK

This isn’t likely to be a recurring category, but check out the kid who allegedly shredded more than $1,000 earmarked to pay for Utah (35) football tickets. Frankly, the story sounds a little suspect to The Dash. But if it’s true, the kid should be grounded until Utah wins a Pac-12 football title. Even if he’s middle-aged by then.

RUINOUS DRINKING GAME OF THE WEEK

In a tireless quest to leave the readership soupy and loopy on Saturdays, The Dash is suggesting weekly drinking games. But really, we all just need to sit back this week and witness the ruination resulting from the decision by Natural Lite to sell 77-packs of bad beer (36) in College Park, home base of the University of Maryland. Yes, 77-packs. In honor of the brand’s birth in 1977. As for the reason why they chose Maryland, I think this viral video from last college football season makes that obvious.

STAT OF THE WEEK

Boston College (37) has played six games and is averaging one blocked kick — for or against — per game. The Eagles have blocked two, and their opponents have blocked four. Stuff always seems to be flying backward when special teams are on the field.

Both of BC’s blocked kicks came last week against North Carolina State. One was a blocked field goal, the other was a blocked punt recovered for a touchdown.

BC had two punts blocked by Holy Cross on Sept. 8, both of them for touchdowns — the only scores the Crusaders had in a 62-14 Eagles victory. Wake Forest also blocked a BC punt for a touchdown, and blocked an extra point as well, in a game the Demon Deacons lost.

So if you’re scoring at home, Boston College is 2-0 when having kicks blocked and 0-1 when blocking kicks. Which is weird.

This would seem to be a problem area for Steve Addazio’s team. The Eagles have had 11 kicks blocked in the past 2 1/2 seasons.

COACH WHO EARNED HIS COMP CAR THIS WEEK

Tom Herman (38), Texas. He was convinced Year 2 in Austin would be better than the 7-6 first season — and after a stunning opening loss to Maryland, that faith is coming to fruition. The Longhorns’ five straight victories, capped by the upset of Oklahoma on Saturday, may not be irrefutable evidence that TEXAS IS BACK — Charlie Strong beat the Sooners once, too. But Texas is on its way back. Check back by the end of November to see how rapidly the comeback is proceeding. If the Longhorns are in the Big 12 title game, it’s happening.

COACH WHO SHOULD TAKE THE BUS TO WORK

Mike Gundy (39), Oklahoma State. When the worst offense in the Big 12 comes to town with a backup quarterback because the starter is hurt, and then the backup is replaced by the true freshman third stringer, it’s best not to give up 48 points and 465 yards. But that’s what Gundy’s team did against Iowa State on Saturday. Brock Purdy had never thrown a collegiate pass until he took on the Oklahoma State defense and tore it apart, completing 18 of 23 for 318 yards and four touchdowns. Purdy also ran for 84 yards and another score. And now Mullet Man has lost four straight Big 12 home games, with two other highly losable ones left (Texas and West Virginia).

POINT AFTER

When thirsty in the football-centric city of Columbus, Ohio, The Dash does not recommend a 77-pack of Natty Lite. Instead, try an Earthrise IPA from Wolf’s Ridge Brewing (40), a swell local outfit that will feed you and ply you with drink in a cool setting. Stop by and thank The Dash later.

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