Clay’s Mom in the Love Is Blind Finale Gave This Season an Actual Soul


Every Love Is Blind finale is full of both heroes and villains. Those we root for and those we despise. And while fans this season may have loved Amy’s sweetness and AD’s pure heart, to me there is a clear winner for the queen of this season: Clay’s mom.

We first were introduced to Clay’s mom, Margarita, in episode nine of season six, when Clay Gravesande introduced his new fiancée, AD Smith, to Margarita and his sister, Taylor. However, his mom loomed large during the couple’s entire relationship, as one of the things Clay struggled with the most was his worry that he could not be faithful in a long-term relationship because his father, Trevor, openly cheated on Margarita during the marriage.

Clay spoke often on the show about how his parents’ divorce deeply rattled his belief in commitment, saying he worried he would make the same mistakes as his father.

“I’m always having a fear of, ‘Can I just be with one person?’” he told the cameras.

In the Love Is Blind finale, we see how much Clay’s worries got in the way of his connection with AD. At the altar Clay revealed he couldn't go through with marriage, saying, “I won’t go there with you when I’m not ready.” He told the cameras he felt like he wasn’t 100% sure he was ready to marry her after their short time together and was unwilling to do so if he didn’t feel completely in.

Afterward, he tells a heartbroken AD that he “was not a husband right now,” emotionally.

“I’m gonna put the work in,” he told her. “I’m gonna go to therapy, all that stuff.”

The cameras then cut to a poignant conversation between Trevor and Margarita. Standing outside in the aftermath of their son’s failed engagement, Margarita turned to her ex and told him the truth. Their son struggled with marriage and with the concept that the institution was sacred because of what he witnessed as a child.

“A lot of that stems from things that you have to explain, and then apologize,” she told him. “Don’t make excuses—just apologize. So that closure can be had.”

She then told her ex that their son had shared that he had a hard time believing in marriage because of his father’s actions. Trevor grew emotional, and she stared at him with the detached sympathy of someone who has put in the work in therapy as he struggled to explain how he “didn’t have the best role models in his life,” either.

Fanning herself with a chic yellow fan, Margarita told Trevor that she forgave him, but it’s on him now to ensure the trauma he inherited from his father did not create more trauma for his son. I mean, is this really reality TV we are watching? Because this woman is way too wise and well adjusted.

She then delivered a line that I feel like we all need to hear, no matter our background.

“Although we came from broken families, that doesn’t mean that we have to pass that brokenness to our kids,” she said. “Your past and the things that you witness—it’s part of your DNA and part of your inside. And if you don’t get freakin’ help, you bring that shit into the next thing…. The fact that [Clay] did this process, he wants to be in a long-term relationship. He wants that.”

“Tell him to meet someone like his mom,” cut in Trevor with a smile, to which Margarita gave a withering look.

“You met me, but you wasn’t good to me,” she retorted. Okay, damn.

The scene is so powerful, so utterly cinematic, and (rare for reality TV) so real, I watched it twice. Margarita’s poise, her calm demeanor in dealing with someone who clearly hurt her, and her even more apparent growth from dealing with the pain life has thrown at her were just plain inspiring.

I'm not alone. After the episode aired, fans were paying tribute to Margarita all over social media.

Let’s be real here. As much as we all enjoy a good love story, 99.9% of the time we are tuning into reality dating shows like Love Is Blind to watch dramatic people engage in high jinks. But it’s these rare moments of humanity that remind us that we are in fact watching real lives, that keep us coming back. A reality dating show does, deep down, need a soul, and Clay’s mom just delivered us a monologue that gave this season a beating heart.

Okay, now back to talking about the drama. Sorry, I just love mess!

Originally Appeared on Glamour