March 02, 2010
For years, we've all been envious of Baron Davis'(notes) extravagant beard. Made from the finest face fibers known to man, simply gazing upon Davis' face has been known to incite jealous rage. But not for long.
This is great news. All this time I've been wasting growing my own beard, and now I can look great for just $29.99. It's marked down from $5,000 so you know you're getting a great deal.
Seriously, we should all get these. You saw how good it made Deron Williams(notes) look, and he's only using "Boom's Beard Lite." Imagine if he were using full-strength. Maybe then his beard would connect to his hair.
You're going to look great. I guarantee it.