Ball Don't Lie - NBA

Aside from the gigantic salary, ability to play a game for a living and luxurious accomodations, being an NBA player has its perks — things like custom cakes, perfume that smells like you and your wife, or free shoes with your name on them. Just little things, really. No big deal, except for that these little things are super cool and us mere mortals will never have a chance to experience that wonder.

Like, for instance, Derrick Rose's(notes) new custom Skittles machine he got for no real reason other than he really likes Skittles. From Darren Rovell:

Earlier this month, [Wrigley] brought a custom, tricked-out Skittles vending machine to his house and promised to keep it stocked with Skittles for at least three years.

Rose gets the machine and the Skittles for free; the Skittles brand has a chance of getting more love from Rose; and the Bulls, I guess, hope Rose's sugar highs peak at the right time.

The folks at Wrigley would only confirm the following facts: The picture is real. The machine holds every variety of Skittles. And it even tempts him, in his own voice, whenever he walks by the machine.

Oh, no big deal — just a free vending machine stocked with free Skittles that just so happens to say, "Hey Derrick, it's you, Derrick. I can tell you want some of these Skittles that I've got because I'm you. Come have some Skittles, man," IN HIS OWN VOICE. This is quite possibly the best vending machine known to man, right up there with the pizza vending machine, and it's all for free. 

A three-year supply of Skittles might not be the best choice nutritionally, but we've seen what happens when you get Derrick Rose around healthy food. As long as this machine doesn't somehow attack him — and considering it's partially robotic, that's a 50-50 chance — it's way safer than him cutting apples in bed. Best gift in the world? Probably.

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