Winnetka, Illinois, hello! You're on the line with Tuffy Rhodes and the guy who stole Chad Kreuter's cap! Go ahead!
As regular readers of this space know, I have somewhat of an unhealthy obsession with Larry King.
Yes, I may be one of his only viewers who doesn't have an AARP card, but his show is my regular rotation while channel surfing and his new book is even on my Amazon wish list.
I will make no apologies for this.
At any rate, Larry (though not his suspenders) not only threw out the first pitch during Saturday's Dodgers-Cubs game at Wrigley Field, but sang the Seventh Inning Stretch as well. Seeing as how I turned down tickets to this game (it was moving day), I haven't been this bummed since missing Eddie Vedder and Marissa Miller at the Friendly Confines.
"What fascinates me is what is going through your mind during this process. After you are over [the tantrum] and you are in the clubhouse and you have showered, what goes through your mind then? Do you reflect on it? When [the tantrum] is on television all night and you watch yourself, what do you think? Do you have kids, and what do they say? Are they embarrassed? There are anger-management courses everywhere. I know that the other kid, the outfielder [Milton Bradley(notes)], he has taken them. Has it helped? It is the hardest thing to cure because you get pent up. You can't win with rage ... It's a sad thing."
But, really, you're completely missing the point. For this post to have any effect on you whatsoever, you'll probably have to reread the above passage in your best King voice for the people in the cubicles around you.
Shoulders hunched, people!
BONUS LINK: To see King croon like his old pal, Jim Nabors, check out the video of his "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" by clicking here. Gotta say that's a great set of pipes on that Dodgers fan, though he should have picked a team for the "root, root, root for the ..." part instead of wimping out and letting the crowd fill it in.