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Presenting ‘Lockout Man’: Puck Daddy’s ode to the NHL work stoppage (VIDEO)

Harrison Mooney
Puck Daddy

It's getting harder and harder to be optimistic about the NHL lockout. In the early days (last week), the Winter Classic loomed in the distance as a season-saver. But now there are reports that the league's marquee game could be canceled as early as November.

People are beginning to settle in for the long haul. Dan Cleary has given up. An acquaintance recently asked me how long I thought the lockout would last. "Because I think it's gonna be a long, long time," he said.

That gave me an idea ... and unfortunately for you fine folk, I had time to act upon that idea. I give you, "Lockout Man".

A big thank-you to Bryan Binnema and Daniel Wagner for lending their musical abilities and Greg Wyshynski for donating his video editing skills.

A big apology to Elton John. And everyone else.

- LYRICS -

I packed my bags last night pre-flight
Zero hour nine a.m.
And I'm gonna be playing KHL by then
I miss the NHL, I miss my life
I had to buy my own insurance
It's such an endless fight

And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till Bettman comes around again to find
We're not the union from 04-05
Oh no no no I'm a lockout man
Lockout man playing out the year here alone
And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Cause HRR should not be redefined
And 57 is a share we like
Oh no no no I'm a lockout man
Lockout man playing out the year out here in Minsk

Now ain't the kind of time to lose the year
In fact it's dumb as hell
There'll be no one left to watch us if you did
And all these lockouts I don't understand
Each seven years, like fallow land
A lockout man, a lockout man

And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till I touch down on regulation ice
5 million tax exempt I won't survive
Oh no no no I'm a lockout man
Lockout man burning down the wing on Dynamo
And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till someone brings an end to labour strife
I might just stay in Russia my whole life
Oh no no no I'm a lockout man
Lockout man taking someone's job out here in alone

Follow Harrison Mooney on Twitter at @HarrisonMooney

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