Colorado Avalanche lip-sync Imagine Dragons and it’s the ickiest thing ever (Video)

The Colorado Avalanche are practically locked into a Western Conference playoff seed, after many predicted they wouldn’t even make the postseason this year. This defying of expectations has prompted their playoff run battle cry: “WHY NOT US?”

Well, little did we know the true meaning of the phrase until the team released a playoff pump-up video on Monday: “No NHL team has made an embarrassingly awful cover of Imagine Dragons’ ‘Radioactive’ featuring sweaty players, terrible acting and shirtless dudes making awkward faces in the bathroom mirror … so WHY NOT US?”

Here are Gabriel Landeskog, Matt Duchene, Nathan MacKinnon, Paul Stastny and the Avalanche covering “Imagine Dragons.” Thus begins your frantic search for a “Men In Black” neurolizer to rid your mind of these images:

A few reactions:

1. The only way we could be more uncomfortably close to Matt Duchene’s face is if someone hit us with a shrink ray and we held a picnic on his lip divot.

2. Please note that the video is, in fact, a remake of the original Imagine Dragons’ clip, much in the same way Gus Van Sant’s “Psycho” was a remake if Hitchcock’s. One major change: The original video had an entire subplot about weird cockfighting Muppets that the Avalanche decided to jettison, which is odd considering how well-cast Cody McLeod would have been.

3. Probably for the best that they didn't get Varlamov to lip-synch "checking out on the prison bus."

4. It is smart, however, for the first state to legalize pot to have its hockey team singing "I'm breathing in the chemicals."

5. Finally … no.

Just ... No.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Well, let it never be said Landeskog isn't a finisher ...

That's quite a music video right there. Congrats, 2008 Washington Capitals, you're off the hook.

s/t to Louie for the find and Mooney for the laughs.