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Matt Hasselbeck hopes he doesn't have to channel William Wallace again
"In the Year of our Lord 2015, Colts of Indianapolis — starving and outnumbered — charged the fields of Jacksonville. They fought like warrior poets; they fought like Hoosiers, and won their freedom."
OK, so maybe Sunday's 16-13 victory wasn't exactly the Battle of Bannockburn, but it sure felt like it for 40-year-old Indianapolis Colts quarterback Matt Hasselbeck, according to Peter King's MMQB column.
"It was really fun running out of the tunnel," Matt Hasselbeck said. "I was so jacked up. I felt like William Wallace in 'Braveheart.' I sort of lost my composure, and the first two passes I threw were waaaaay off-target. I got to the sidelines and said to myself, ‘Dude, you need to CHILL OUT!'"
Excuse us while we terrify ourselves with an animated gif of Hasselbeck as Wallace in "Braveheart."
You might not draw too many parallels between the two. First off, Wallace had a ton of hair, and Hasselbeck has none. Not that there's anything wrong with that. (See writer's photo below.) I don't recall Wallace falling ill before the Battle of Falkirk, but Hasselbeck told King he "threw up" heading into his first start in 1,062 days. And Wallace's "they'll never take our freedom" speech might be the greatest in film history, while Hasselbeck's "we want the ball" declaration may have been the worst in football history.
However, Hasselbeck did lead the Colts to victory against the Jaguars on Sunday, throwing 47 passes without an interception while engineering game-tying drives in the third and fourth quarters and a game-winning drive in overtime. As a result, Indianapolis now leads the terrible AFC South. FREEDOM!
Whether he'll have to lead the Colts into battle again remains in question, as King reported starting QB Andrew Luck's status is "no better than 50-50" for Thursday's game against the Houston Texans.
“Everyone in our locker room, and everyone in the state of Indiana, hopes he’s ready to go,” Hasselbeck said. “Everyone expects him to be ready, including me. I’ll probably be playing scout team quarterback again this week.”
Matt Hasselbeck. Brian Hoyer. Cue Hank Williams Jr.: Are you ready for some football? Here's hoping Hasselbeck walks over to Hoyer during the coin toss and says, "Before we let you leave, your coach must cross that field, present himself before this team, put his head between his legs, and kiss his own arse."
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is a contributor for Ball Don't Lie and Shutdown Corner on Yahoo Sports. Have a tip? Email him at rohrbach_ben@yahoo.com or follow him on Twitter! Follow @brohrbach
