Harrison Mooney

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  • Puck Daddy watches 'Sudden Death', hockey's greatest action movie

    Imagine Die Hard, except instead of being set in an office building, it's set in The Igloo, the former home of the Pittsburgh Penguins, on the same night the Penguins play the Chicago Blackhawks in Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final.

    THAT MOVIE EXISTS. It's called Sudden Death, and it stars Jean Claude Van Damme as Jean Claude Van Damme, basically.

    The film is probably best known for its infamous penguin fight scene, in which JCVD kills Penguins' mascot Iceburgh by way of an industrial dishwasher. (It's an absurd and overlong scene that inspired the Peter Griffin-fights-a-chicken-forever bit on Family Guy). But there's more to the movie than just JCVD fighting a giant penguin. Based on an idea by Karen Elise Baldwin, the wife of film producer and then-Penguins co-owner Howard Baldwin, Sudden Death is a non-stop thrill ride full of murder, martial arts, and mullets. And this weekend I watched it.

    ***

    We open on a burning building, where Jean Claude Van Fireman is trapped under some rubble

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  • Panthers pass on Bylsma, set to introduce Gerard Gallant as next head coach

    The last three Florida Panthers head coaches arrived on the job with no NHL head coaching experience, so naturally, after running through that trio in just four years, GM Dale Tallon listed experience as a major priority this time around. That in mind, all signs pointed to the recently-ousted Dan Bylsma.

    Save dollar signs, of course, which is why the cash-strapped Panthers went in a different direction, announcing Saturday that Gerard Gallant would be the 13th head coach of the franchise. From the Panthers:

    “We are pleased to welcome Gerard as the new head coach of the Florida Panthers,” said Dale Tallon, in a release. “He is an individual with tremendous character, integrity and a strong passion for the game and has experience as an NHL head coach. Gerard is an excellent teacher and motivator who possesses the leadership qualities and hockey knowledge that are necessary to lead our team.”

    Note that Tallon stressed Gallant's experience, just to underscore that the Panthers may have

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  • P.K. Subban tries Tinder on red carpet for Canadian video music awards (Video)

    P.K. Subban on what he looks for in a woman: "It's first sight. It's either a yea or nay."

    Which makes him a perfect candidate for Tinder, which presents a photo of a woman and allows you to swipe left or right, signifying either "like" or nope" (which are, as it happens, synonyms for yea or nay).

    And on Wednesday night, at the MuchMusic Video Awards (the Canadian equivalent of the MTV VMAs), the Canadiens' blueliner was given the opportunity to try the popular dating app for the first time. There's video:

    "Which one? Both?"

    "Maybe."

    Yeah, maybe. Especially if you're P.K. Subban.

    He's doing it all wrong, though, by swiping left so frequently. The trick is to swipe right on pretty much everybody, to maximize your chances at getting a match, and then simply don't say hello or block the ones you're not interested in after a second look. Or at least that's what I've been told. What's Tinder, anyway?

    Subban seemed to be getting the hang of it by the end. "If it's a maybe, it's a no," he

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  • Here are your Puck Headlines: a glorious collection of news and views collected from the greatest blogosphere in sports and the few, the proud, the mainstream hockey media.

    Evgeni Malkin goes fishing.Evgeni Malkin goes fishing.

    • Evgeni Malkin has gone fishing. I guess with his bare hands. [Evgeni Malkin]

    • Why you should be terrified of the Tampa Bay Lightning. [The Score]

    • The Lightning have re-signed Alex Killorn for two more years. [Raw Charge]

    • I'm gonna be honest: San Jose's "rebuild" terrifies me. It seems reactionary and I don't want to live in a world where Doug Wilson looks rattled. [Yahoo]

    • Wondering who's drafting where, and who traded what pick to whom? Here's your complete rundown of the draft order. [NHL]

    • Next season marks an important milestone for the New York Islanders: it's the last year they pay Alexei Yashin not to play for them. [Puck Drunk Love]

    • Dave Nonis still thinks the Leafs are good: "I think we collectively, fans, people with the team, you are too negative when things don’t go well and too positive when

    Read More »from Lightning re-sign Killorn; Islanders soon to be Yashin-free; Sharks' rebuild (Puck Headlines)
  • Tomas Tatar, Darren Helm resolve lawsuit over noise issues, avoid eviction

    Back in late March, Tomas Tatar and Darren Helm found themselves in a bit of a spot.

    The foremost concern, of course, was that the pair ran the risk of playing for the first Detroit Red Wings team in over two decades to miss the playoffs.

    And then, to make matters worse, they were hit with an eviction lawsuit

    Helm's condo in Royal Oak, Michigan, which was being subletted by Helm, had become the source of frequent and excessive noise, including loud music and banging on the floors and walls (presumably the literal kind of banging, not the Shaggy "It wasn't me" kind), between the hours of midnight and 4 a.m.

    Those are the hours when people like to be asleep. Hence, a lawsuit was filed, and Helm and Tatar were asked to vacate the premises. 

    But, much like the Red Wings were able to keep their playoff streak alive, so too were Helm and Tatar able to salvage their living quarters. The issues have been resolved, and on Thursday, the Detroit News reported that the lawsuit was dropped like

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  • Avs, O'Reilly back at it; Sharks' broadcast issues; Phaneuf to Capitals? (Puck Headlines)

    Here are your Puck Headlines: a glorious collection of news and views collected from the greatest blogosphere in sports and the few, the proud, the mainstream hockey media.

    Yasiel Puig meets Stanley.Yasiel Puig meets Stanley.

    • Yasiel Puig touches the Stanley Cup without winning it, cursing the Dodgers' Cup hopes forever. [@Dodgers]

    • The Avalanche and Ryan O'Reilly aren't getting along again. They should break up. [Denver Post]

    • Will the Winnipeg Jets trade Evander Kane this summer? [Winnipeg Free Press]

    • The Capitals are looking for a backup netminder. Who are the options? [Japers' Rink]

    • Another question for the Capitals: should they go after Dion Phaneuf? [CSN Washington]

    • Shawn Thornton was a good Bruin, but the next team that signs him will just be getting a mascot. [The Score]

    • Things have gone wonky with the Sharks' TV deal. Will it affect their ability to stay in San Jose? [Inside Bay Area]

    • Speaking of Sharks' broadcast news, Drew Remenda won't be back with that team next year. That's terrible, because he's excellent. [

    Read More »from Avs, O'Reilly back at it; Sharks' broadcast issues; Phaneuf to Capitals? (Puck Headlines)
  • Canadiens sign Weise; buyout time; Stralman leaving Rangers? (Puck Headlines)

    Here are your Puck Headlines: a glorious collection of news and views collected from the greatest blogosphere in sports and the few, the proud, the mainstream hockey media.

    It's the circle of life. @LAKingsIt's the circle of life. @LAKings

    • Kyle Clifford presents his firstborn to the Pride Lands. Later, he will counsel his child to stay away from the forbidden land: Orange County. 

    • The Montreal Canadiens have signed a two-year contract extension with Dale Weise. [Canadiens]

    • Doug Wilson is talking rebuild in San Jose, the first time he's ever used the word to describe his plans. Will the Sharks' fanbase be willing to endure an overhaul? [Working the Corners]

    • The Blue Jackets are actively trying to trade R.J. Umberger. [Blue Jackets Xtra]

    • Brian Boyle and Anton Stralman hint at the end of their time with the Rangers. The latter's departure will likely matter more than the former's. [NY Post]

    • Once he's done celebrating, Dean Lombari's gonna be up all night, work, work, work, work, working on his team. Does Mike Richards get bought out? Does

    Read More »from Canadiens sign Weise; buyout time; Stralman leaving Rangers? (Puck Headlines)
  • Canucks to buy out David Booth, one of the weirdest dudes they've ever employed

    The David Booth era in Vancouver is over, as the Canucks have placed the left winger on waivers. He'll soon become the club's second and final compliance buyout.

    With that, the city of Vancouver says goodbye to one of the most unique and divisive Canucks ever, a guy that tended to make more waves for his off-ice activites -- killing a bear, kissing a bear, taking a slackline to the groin, getting married in the field where he killed his largest deer -- than his on-ice production.

    Therein lay the problem with Booth. He was, as John Tortorella and others put it, a truly weird dude, and that would have been fine if he had also been a productive one. But thanks to injuries and inconsistent play, Booth never even came close to living up to his $4.5M annual cap hit, so he just became a source of annoyance for Vancouver fans. 

    With the Canucks taking a torch to the old regime in every meaningful way, you can see why the new regime, led by Jim Benning, might decide it was simply better to

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  • Hockey Hugs, Stanley Cup Final edition: Dustin Brown's leadership tooth

    The Los Angeles Kings are your 2013-14 Stanley Cup champions. The season is over.

    Don't cry for its end. Cry, instead, because it means we've come to the final Hockey Hugs of the year (save for our annual countdown of the season's 10 best hugs). It'll be four months before we get any fresh hugs, and if you've been watching Orange is the New Black, you know that a pretty long time to go without.

    Fortunately, the series ends strong, thanks to some high-end hugging from the Los Angeles Kings and the New York Rangers in the Final. 

    Also one quality kiss, as Anze Kopitar and Justin Williams once again demonstrate the chemistry that led the Kings to their second championship in three years.

    But you didn't come here to see two dudes kissing. (Or maybe you did. If so, I'd say you've been misinformed.) You came to see the best dude-hugs hockey has to offer. And we've got 'em.

    No. 6: Los Angeles Kings

    Dwight King and Jeff Carter celebrate a goal, and also provide a nice contrast of smiles. 

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  • The LA Kings are not a dynasty

    The hockey world loves a good story.

    For evidence, one need look no further than Justin Williams, Mr. Conn Smythe himself, who took home the award not so much because he was truly the Kings' most valuable player in these NHL playoffs -- I think we can all agree LA would have suffered much, much more if someone had removed Drew Doughty or leading scorer Anze Kopitar from the lineup -- but because he was the most noticeable player. 

    Williams was at the center of every big moment, the man who somehow happened along whenever we, like Bonnie Tyler, needed a hero. Thus, larger than life and fresh from the fight, Justin Williams took home the Conn Smythe.

    And now, fresh off giving a good story a good ending, the hockey world is looking to up the stakes of this year's story even more, and even more preposterously, by granting "dynasty" status to these Kings.

    I can see the desire for it. It's just been so long, and a media has needs, you guys. 

    Hockey's desperate for a dynasty. So desperate

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